sadness . . .
sitting by herself in the worst of seats, her eyes shift through the faces for someone familiar . she turns around and flashes her friends a huge grin, who're too busily engaged in a funny conversation . she turns back, wondering what she's missing out on . "i could do with a couple of laughs .. " ,she thought , scowling .
you shouldn't make the mistake i made , ending up friendless ., mom had said to her ..
long bouts of loneliness always made her sad . life had taken a rather nasty turn when on 6th July , 1997 she was shoved quite unceremoniously into boarding school, under unavoidable circumstances . it was different to grow up like that , your formative years now in your own hands,having to go through boys , bunk-beds , evil wardens and swear words.she knew not many would've had a taste of all this in one go. for this , and this alone , she considered herself lucky - lucky for the experience.
having reached breaking point , it was time to ship out of the place.
the time after that was nothing worth mentioning . it went OK , at least , it was normal , as she called it . but who could deny that things hadn't changed . her parents still thought she was the same kid they had left at the boarding school years back, the innocent little kid with the Bambi eyes and two plaits .
the sudden brake made her snap out of her reverie. "why do i have to go visit those thoughts now ..." , she thought. truth of the matter was , loneliness was a terrible thing . how would it be to go through life and never have a best friend . when the mind is littered with thoughts . the head is heavy and the heart is sad and lonely, and you have no one to turn to, the truth dawns on you. spending your life as a loner (which i consider is 2nd most depressing after having to see old men with crinkly eyes pulling those horrible carts in the sun .. i cant see such things . it gets me terribly depressed ) devoid of anyone to call your own , though you might be the most popular person in your circle.
no one confesses , but there are too many loners out there , all craving for someone to talk to, to hang out with,to perhaps fight with . a friend .. who'd probably do a thing for you , sacrifice here while being a bit cheeky there .
i wish the world would open their eyes , come out of their shells, shed that snake skin, rip off the facade and present themselves with warm ( and so what if toothy ?? :) ) smiles on their faces . reach out to those who you think need you, need someone. life sucks for many , yet life nevertheless goes on with them peeling their eyes for the first few signs of the morning rays , which will soon be enough to blind them with its sheer brilliance ..
she awaits her ray of hope ... like many many
you shouldn't make the mistake i made , ending up friendless ., mom had said to her ..
long bouts of loneliness always made her sad . life had taken a rather nasty turn when on 6th July , 1997 she was shoved quite unceremoniously into boarding school, under unavoidable circumstances . it was different to grow up like that , your formative years now in your own hands,having to go through boys , bunk-beds , evil wardens and swear words.she knew not many would've had a taste of all this in one go. for this , and this alone , she considered herself lucky - lucky for the experience.
having reached breaking point , it was time to ship out of the place.
the time after that was nothing worth mentioning . it went OK , at least , it was normal , as she called it . but who could deny that things hadn't changed . her parents still thought she was the same kid they had left at the boarding school years back, the innocent little kid with the Bambi eyes and two plaits .
the sudden brake made her snap out of her reverie. "why do i have to go visit those thoughts now ..." , she thought. truth of the matter was , loneliness was a terrible thing . how would it be to go through life and never have a best friend . when the mind is littered with thoughts . the head is heavy and the heart is sad and lonely, and you have no one to turn to, the truth dawns on you. spending your life as a loner (which i consider is 2nd most depressing after having to see old men with crinkly eyes pulling those horrible carts in the sun .. i cant see such things . it gets me terribly depressed ) devoid of anyone to call your own , though you might be the most popular person in your circle.
no one confesses , but there are too many loners out there , all craving for someone to talk to, to hang out with,to perhaps fight with . a friend .. who'd probably do a thing for you , sacrifice here while being a bit cheeky there .
i wish the world would open their eyes , come out of their shells, shed that snake skin, rip off the facade and present themselves with warm ( and so what if toothy ?? :) ) smiles on their faces . reach out to those who you think need you, need someone. life sucks for many , yet life nevertheless goes on with them peeling their eyes for the first few signs of the morning rays , which will soon be enough to blind them with its sheer brilliance ..
she awaits her ray of hope ... like many many
posted by miss wabbit at 8:10 PM
11 Comments:
What's with the date 6th July 1997?
random :) simple as that , fat-head ..
too much thought about oneself... leaves the crinkly eyed man the most depressing thing followed by the lonely girl.. though many can relate to it.. one would rather not..
too true... dont look too far..GENIUS!!!
P.S: I am going to need proof about the plaits.. LOL..
Knowing how it feels is the only way a person can relate to what has been written, and trust me i do!! But, as others before havin faced the similar situation have told, the only solution which is left is to go on, persistent in reaching your dream. This is the only definin thing that keeps you frm breaking down in your own self pity.
ROCK ON!!!!!
and why would one "rather not" realte to it ? are'nt you then just running from the truth ?!!!
engulfed in a feeling of lonliness u thrive...
confined in a box u think u can survive?
u need to see the world with a mind restless and free....
and not think that somethings are never meant to be...
waitin for a ray of hope u say...
a light in the darkness to show u the way...
but wat if it is already here...
invisible for now...but will soon disapear...
only because u knw not wat ure looking for....
blinded by the darkness u tend to ignore...
open ure eyes and try to see
the good things that are around u...un-noticed by thee....
;o)
bday wishes....belated....better late than never...
you have really echoed my feelings...truly...when i was shifted from a world where i was so sure of myself to a place totally cool but what to say mmm unsure(now i know there is no place as that)??..i built a kinda force field arnd me(fear of ridicule)...lettin only things to pass thru which i felt was i sure about...i started expecting people to do things i like...i didn't show up for parties sometimes...the best place to hang out was home....hey i'm not insane r somethin,i have a lot of friends,but somethin is missing, i don't know what...many a times i still feel i'm alone...making friends was and is never easy for me...i started by lessenin the strength of the field arnd me...i'm beginin to like it...i dunno in what way this is relevant...but still i have poured out my thoughts...
hey...there's a first time for everything
hey who's this? "for standing on a wall"
Good one..!! things like this go well where ppl can relate themselves to these scenes..!! Being more vulnerable to friendships and not gettin enough happiness out of it causes a twinge..And now after a longtime realised that its the involvement which i show towards ppl mite bear something worth to my vulnerability..!!
I totally agree with Siddhart. Ahh, but when people don't respond, or are set on someone else..it 'hoits' (hurts).
Nice blog btw :)
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